Prologue
A century ago, a middle aged woman fought the battle of her life. My co-worker, Shirley Morgan and I were sitting at the table watching the kids eat lunch and she was cleaning out her bag. While cleaning out her bag she pulled out this bottle of spray. I looked at it, and I asked her what that was. She told me that it was her deodorant. I was puzzled and she could see the expression on my face and she went on to tell me that she had to use this kind because she is a survivor of breast cancer. Tears came to my eyes, I was in shock. This lady that I have grown to look to as my grandmother, I would have never guessed she went through this whole ordeal. The days that she felt like giving up to the days where she felt like nothing ever happened. She has such a great personality, happy, upbeat and spunky. She is not a typical older lady. We sat there at the table and she told me the whole experience. She had many supporters along with her family by her side the entire time. All the pain that she had, the days that she felt like giving up, she never lost her faith in god, and most importantly her spunk. I believe the best was to share her story was in a memoir. I believe that writing a memoir spoke more by capturing the emotions, and I feel that you can put yourself in her eyes through the ordeal.
The moment that I got diagnosed and I saw the tears in your eyes that was the moment I knew I had to pull through. I still remember till this day those horrid words, “Shirley you have breast cancer.” Tears immediately came to my eyes and I asked God, “Why me?” The doctor told me the process and I asked some questions then I was free to go.
The ride home felt endless. I just wanted to wake up from this dream. It wasn’t a dream though, this was reality. I arrived home; it was time to break the news to my dearest husband Lenard. When I walked in Lenard was sitting reading the paper. “Hello dear, how was your appointment?” asked Lenard. At that moment I had to fight back tears. I sat down next to him. “Sweetheart, I have breast cancer.” I said. His faced dropped; I could see he was holding back tears. He got up from his chair took my hands, stood me up and hugged me. While hugging me he whispered in my ear “We are going to get through this, I promise.”
One person down, now it was time to break the news to my wonderful children. I knew this news would devastate them. I had to be strong. If I could remain calm in front of them, I knew sharing the news would be easier on them. I invited my four wonderful children to dinner. After we enjoyed a lovely chicken dinner, I asked all of us to go sit down in the living room.
“Brenda, Sarah, Miyah and Curtis, I have something to tell you, I have breast cancer.” I could see the tears in their eyes, the sadness in their faces. “My children I’m going to get through this. That is a promise.” My kids came up to me with hugs and kisses. “We love you mom, we are behind you always.”
From that moment on I knew I would pull through this. I have a wonderful support system and my faith in God. The first day of chemotherapy came rather quickly. That morning I awoke and told myself that I would be alright. Lenard and I got into the car and headed to the hospital. When we arrived I got checked in and I waited.
“Shirley, it is time. You can come back.” I went back here we go I thought. I whispered a prayer to God to watch over me.
A few hours later, the treatment was over. I felt weak and nausea the whole ride home. When we arrived home he helped me get into bed. “Just rest my dear.” Lenard said.
When I awoke I headed downstairs to a room filled with my wonderful family-my supporters. We had a relaxing night discussing my treatment and what happens from here on out. Once I finish my round of chemotherapy they would do another biopsy. All I could do now was keep going for my chemotherapy treatments and pray.
The months passed some worse then others. There were days that I was nausea all day. I could barely even get out of the bathroom. I felt that all I did was hunch over the toilet with a towel next to me. Those were the days that I felt like giving up. I didnt feel like a human being. Then I would have days that I felt brand new. The days that I woke up with no pain, all the strength in the world. The days that my grandchildren come over. Those were the days that I felt like that my strength and hope came back. I just had to remind myself that I would get through this. The last chemo treatment came and went; it was now time to get my biopsy. I headed to the hospital for hopefully the last time. An hour passed, the biopsy was completed, and all I could do now was wait and pray.
A week went by and the phone rang on a beautiful Tuesday morning, “Hello.” I said, “Mrs. Morgan?”, “Yes.” I replied, “This is Karen. "We received the results of your biopsy. I’m sorry to tell you, the cancer is still there.” She said. “What is the next step?” I asked.
I had to go to the doctor to talk about my options. A week later I went and we discussed my options. Lenard was holding my hand the entire time. When the doctor told me the options of doing another round of chemotherapy or having breast reconstruction, I realized that this was a major decision. Lenard and I thanked the doctor and told him I would be in contact with my decision.
When Lenard and I arrived home, we sat down and discussed how we are going to tell our children. We talked for hours and we came up with a decision. It was now time to tell everyone. We made the calls and invited them all to the house. Once everyone arrived it was time to tell them our decision.
“Children I had my biopsy done and I got the results that the chemotherapy didn’t work.” I said strongly. I could see the fear in their faces. I had to be strong for them.
“Being that the chemo didn’t work I have the options of doing another round of chemotherapy or having complete breast reconstruction. Your father and I have discussed this and decided that I don’t want to do another round of chemo. I am going to have the surgery.”My children looked depressed. They came up to me one by one and they all had the same response:“Mom we back you up in whatever decision you make.” Making the phone call to my doctor was easier knowing I had the support of my family. Once I told my doctor my decision, he wanted to schedule the surgery as soon as possible.
The surgery was scheduled in two weeks. That wasn’t much time to prepare. I did what I could in the short amount of time and before I knew it the day was here. When it was time to go the hospital all my loved ones were right by my side. Before I went inwe all prayed and I held each and every one of them for several minutes. Before I went through the door I said:“See you in a few hours, Love you all.”I changed my clothes and got into bed. I said a prayer to God to watch over me. It was time; I was in Gods hands now.
I opened my eyes to a room filled with flowers. I see all familiar faces surrounding me. My beloved husband and four wonderful children were all by my bedside. I was sore, but I made it through. I knew I would. I have a long road of recovery ahead of me, but I know that I have my family behind me. I am a survivor!
The ride home felt endless. I just wanted to wake up from this dream. It wasn’t a dream though, this was reality. I arrived home; it was time to break the news to my dearest husband Lenard. When I walked in Lenard was sitting reading the paper. “Hello dear, how was your appointment?” asked Lenard. At that moment I had to fight back tears. I sat down next to him. “Sweetheart, I have breast cancer.” I said. His faced dropped; I could see he was holding back tears. He got up from his chair took my hands, stood me up and hugged me. While hugging me he whispered in my ear “We are going to get through this, I promise.”
One person down, now it was time to break the news to my wonderful children. I knew this news would devastate them. I had to be strong. If I could remain calm in front of them, I knew sharing the news would be easier on them. I invited my four wonderful children to dinner. After we enjoyed a lovely chicken dinner, I asked all of us to go sit down in the living room.
“Brenda, Sarah, Miyah and Curtis, I have something to tell you, I have breast cancer.” I could see the tears in their eyes, the sadness in their faces. “My children I’m going to get through this. That is a promise.” My kids came up to me with hugs and kisses. “We love you mom, we are behind you always.”
From that moment on I knew I would pull through this. I have a wonderful support system and my faith in God. The first day of chemotherapy came rather quickly. That morning I awoke and told myself that I would be alright. Lenard and I got into the car and headed to the hospital. When we arrived I got checked in and I waited.
“Shirley, it is time. You can come back.” I went back here we go I thought. I whispered a prayer to God to watch over me.
A few hours later, the treatment was over. I felt weak and nausea the whole ride home. When we arrived home he helped me get into bed. “Just rest my dear.” Lenard said.
When I awoke I headed downstairs to a room filled with my wonderful family-my supporters. We had a relaxing night discussing my treatment and what happens from here on out. Once I finish my round of chemotherapy they would do another biopsy. All I could do now was keep going for my chemotherapy treatments and pray.
The months passed some worse then others. There were days that I was nausea all day. I could barely even get out of the bathroom. I felt that all I did was hunch over the toilet with a towel next to me. Those were the days that I felt like giving up. I didnt feel like a human being. Then I would have days that I felt brand new. The days that I woke up with no pain, all the strength in the world. The days that my grandchildren come over. Those were the days that I felt like that my strength and hope came back. I just had to remind myself that I would get through this. The last chemo treatment came and went; it was now time to get my biopsy. I headed to the hospital for hopefully the last time. An hour passed, the biopsy was completed, and all I could do now was wait and pray.
A week went by and the phone rang on a beautiful Tuesday morning, “Hello.” I said, “Mrs. Morgan?”, “Yes.” I replied, “This is Karen. "We received the results of your biopsy. I’m sorry to tell you, the cancer is still there.” She said. “What is the next step?” I asked.
I had to go to the doctor to talk about my options. A week later I went and we discussed my options. Lenard was holding my hand the entire time. When the doctor told me the options of doing another round of chemotherapy or having breast reconstruction, I realized that this was a major decision. Lenard and I thanked the doctor and told him I would be in contact with my decision.
When Lenard and I arrived home, we sat down and discussed how we are going to tell our children. We talked for hours and we came up with a decision. It was now time to tell everyone. We made the calls and invited them all to the house. Once everyone arrived it was time to tell them our decision.
“Children I had my biopsy done and I got the results that the chemotherapy didn’t work.” I said strongly. I could see the fear in their faces. I had to be strong for them.
“Being that the chemo didn’t work I have the options of doing another round of chemotherapy or having complete breast reconstruction. Your father and I have discussed this and decided that I don’t want to do another round of chemo. I am going to have the surgery.”My children looked depressed. They came up to me one by one and they all had the same response:“Mom we back you up in whatever decision you make.” Making the phone call to my doctor was easier knowing I had the support of my family. Once I told my doctor my decision, he wanted to schedule the surgery as soon as possible.
The surgery was scheduled in two weeks. That wasn’t much time to prepare. I did what I could in the short amount of time and before I knew it the day was here. When it was time to go the hospital all my loved ones were right by my side. Before I went inwe all prayed and I held each and every one of them for several minutes. Before I went through the door I said:“See you in a few hours, Love you all.”I changed my clothes and got into bed. I said a prayer to God to watch over me. It was time; I was in Gods hands now.
I opened my eyes to a room filled with flowers. I see all familiar faces surrounding me. My beloved husband and four wonderful children were all by my bedside. I was sore, but I made it through. I knew I would. I have a long road of recovery ahead of me, but I know that I have my family behind me. I am a survivor!
Dearest Family and Friends,
Thank you for being there. I love each and every one of you and I couldn’t get through this without you. God Bless Always.
Love, Shirley
Thank you for being there. I love each and every one of you and I couldn’t get through this without you. God Bless Always.
Love, Shirley
